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Post by Dabeagle on Sept 2, 2015 17:51:35 GMT -5
I realized, too late, that many of you may not see my original post if not logged in.
I'm still struggling to make any sense of this. My mind moves from wanting to cry to what to do next to...fizzling into nothing. Ryan Bartlett was my friend, even though I didn't get to meet him in person, didn't get to speak to him on the phone - yet I sat up almost every night for the last 10 months or so, speaking to him. I learned a lot about him - how sad he was, his hopes and fears. I got to know him as a human being.
Late Saturday, his time, he sent me an email that he was sick. Not having heard from him, and not getting any responses, I took what I knew of him and went looking to see if I could tell if he was all right. What I found was that my friend had passed away. I do not know the cause, only that he died on the 31st. The last message I have from him is that he was sick, dying. If you knew Ryan, he had a gift for hyperbole and told me several times that he was dying from eating one thing or another.
He was only 37. He hadn't come out to his family. He had no husband or boyfriend. I know he leaves behind his dog, Debbie, his friend Jen, his sister and her husband and their two kids. His mother, whose experiences influenced a work not yet posted.
I cannot make sense of this and I cannot focus. My friend has died.
Goodbye, Ryan Bartlett.
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Post by paul b on Sept 2, 2015 18:02:58 GMT -5
My deepest condolences to you and ryans friends and family he will be sorely mised a great author
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Post by Lindsay on Sept 2, 2015 18:16:55 GMT -5
My deepest condolences to those he left behind, and to you.
I came across this post accidentally, just browsing as I had just sent Ryan an email, maybe an hour ago, in regards to Finding Niki. I was finally catching up on the Springs world and My Secret Identity, and came here. My heart is saddened at this loss.
Rest in perfect peace Ryan.
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Post by Cynus on Sept 2, 2015 18:24:54 GMT -5
This poem is dedicated to the memory of Ryan Bartlett.
Another Passage
By Cynus
What fleeting life and fleeting time,
Has rendered me without a friend?
For the clock has struck its final chime,
And now the pyre burns.
I wonder where the time has gone,
For my friend journeys with it still,
To the end of all and then beyond,
This world no longer his concern.
I cannot help but reminisce,
Through words; the craft we both pursued,
Of times which we will not have hence,
And memories for which I yearn.
Be well, my friend, and journey forth,
This is not the ending of your tale.
Your words will tarry with their worth,
And bring about your oft return.
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Post by jamessavik on Sept 2, 2015 18:53:31 GMT -5
we are too often
reminded that our time is
at the very best fleeting
By the passing of
a friend too soon before he
could tell all his tales
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Post by Lugnutz on Sept 2, 2015 19:05:19 GMT -5
I didn't think much of him after he gave me a lot of attitude last year. He can write though. I never wished him no harm. We just didn't see eye to eye.
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Post by Valkyrie on Sept 2, 2015 19:27:33 GMT -5
I didn't know Ryan, but it's clear he touched a lot of lives with his writing. I'm sad that my friends are hurting and my heart goes out to all who knew him. My thoughts are with you. *hug*
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Post by hoskins on Sept 2, 2015 20:13:06 GMT -5
He was witty and abrasive and clearly loved writing, and I'm absolutely sure that your collaborations with him improved his days. Take heart in that, if you can.
He's left a good, solid legacy in his stories and his presence here. I'll miss him.
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Post by Dabeagle on Sept 2, 2015 20:13:27 GMT -5
This poem is dedicated to the memory of Ryan Bartlett. Another Passage By Cynus What fleeting life and fleeting time, Has rendered me without a friend? For the clock has struck its final chime, And now the pyre burns. I wonder where the time has gone, For my friend journeys with it still, To the end of all and then beyond, This world no longer his concern. I cannot help but reminisce, Through words; the craft we both pursued, Of times which we will not have hence, And memories for which I yearn. Be well, my friend, and journey forth, This is not the ending of your tale. Your words will tarry with their worth, And bring about your oft return. It's beautiful, Sam. I can't stop crying. |
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Post by Dabeagle on Sept 3, 2015 0:23:53 GMT -5
I didn't think much of him after he gave me a lot of attitude last year. He can write though. I never wished him no harm. We just didn't see eye to eye. Ryan could be arrogant, judgmental, thin skinned - there was a lot of reasons for people not to like him. I won't say you weren't justified in your feelings. Ryan and I had a mutual respect, we fought or aggressively discussed a great many things. We were polar opposites in politics and a few other subjects. He could be dramatic and infuriating. But we shared a mutual love of our boys in Sanitaria Springs and that always brought us back to the table. I think, in some ways, he was more valuable to me because we stayed friends despite our disagreements. I was often exasperated at the juvenile things he'd say, knowing that he should know better. He was, however, a decent man at heart. He was angry with his life, sad, fearful and desperately seeking some validation and meaning for his life. He was a deeply flawed individual - and for all that, I still called him my friend. Even now I'm having trouble sleeping because I had stuff written for him to see - stuff he'd suggested. He was working on a chapter I hadn't yet seen, and now never will. I definitely understand that you won't be affected as I will - very few will. I don't blame you. But I do miss him and our lives, via our shared adventures in Sanitaria Springs, were better for him having been there. |
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Post by Lugnutz on Sept 3, 2015 1:44:56 GMT -5
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Post by PaulR5 on Sept 3, 2015 1:52:03 GMT -5
Dave, what you and Lugnutz just said regarding Ryan resonates with the unexpectedly delightful IM he and I had via Facebook PM on August 28. He could be thin-skinned if receiving the wrong kind of teasing. He wrote well, however, and would accept compliments on his writing, even if he would also tell you that you had not interpreted something rightly.
I will miss him.
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Post by James Merkin on Sept 3, 2015 8:10:25 GMT -5
I am shocked and saddened to learn of this unexpected loss. I never corresponded with Ryan directly, and knew him only through his work and his commentary, here and elsewhere. He was a valued member of our community of writers. Ryan’s contribution, especially to the incredibly impressive development of the Sanitaria Springs saga, will be a monument to his memory.
Dave, please accept my heartfelt expression of sympathy and support. This must be a most awful time for you.
James Merkin
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Post by Dabeagle on Sept 3, 2015 10:18:04 GMT -5
I am shocked and saddened to learn of this unexpected loss. I never corresponded with Ryan directly, and knew him only through his work and his commentary, here and elsewhere. He was a valued member of our community of writers. Ryan’s contribution, especially to the incredibly impressive development of the Sanitaria Springs saga, will be a monument to his memory. Dave, please accept my heartfelt expression of sympathy and support. This must be a most awful time for you. James Merkin Thank you, James. I'm devastated. It's an awful thing about our online existence, that the only indication we have that something is wrong is when the other person is suddenly not communicating. I knew enough about his private life to hunt him down, and stumbled on his obit by accident. It was a horrible shock and I've been stunned, since. Stupid things keeping me awake like what's to become of SS, where we would have gone, next. Discussions we'd have been having. I sent him an email this morning, just to try and have some sense of closure...we'll see if it helps. I'm thinking of sending flowers to his funeral with a note from his friends and family in Sanitaria Springs. I think he'd have found it wonderfully subversive. |
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Post by Nick Deverill on Sept 3, 2015 10:35:16 GMT -5
Only just found out. What a shame, a talented young man with everything to aim for. 'Finding Niki' is a nice way to leave, but it makes it obvious he had so much more to give. My condolences to all those he left behind. As might be said somewhere else, the shed door closes, we'll not see his like again. Nick - from the other side of the pond -  |
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